Gone are the days that “orobo” was the talk of the town; the days when it’s customary in some States in Nigeria (I won’t mention names) who glorify big bodies to introduced a woman who is about to be married into the “fatting room” for months where she’s overfed and encouraged to blow her size to appeal her husband. In those days, orobo was sexy and men like their women bigger and round. As for lepa, she’s repulsive and unfit for marriage. Today, there is a new trend in fashion that favors the “lepa”. It still baffles me how fast things have changed; how People no longer wished for bigger bodies like I wished for it in my growing up days.
In my growing up days, those who were “fortunate” like me to be tall and slim were called “sugar cane or thread”. I remember how I will lock myself up in the room and wish for a body type dominant in Nigeria then. “Lord!” I'd cry bitterly, “Why did you create me thin.” When answers weren't forthcoming from God's throne, I decided to help myself as the saying goes, “heaven helps those who help themselves”. In the midst of my bitterness, I would eat large chunk of food and sleep all day yet, I was like “angulu”, the vulture who no matter what he eats; he's still miserably thin. I hated my body and gradually, I began to lose grasp of my self-esteem like many people are innocently doing today. Comparison bought me over and I was gradually switching off my once happy world into a pity party.
Sistaz were more exposed to criticism in those days in words or actions. Then, there were less fashion styles to bring out the hidden beauty within the lepas. Guys make matters worse then; they looked at slim sistaz as unworthy of love – as if love will break them into two. I remember a sista in my high school that wore more dress inside her uniform to be big and appeal the male folks who didnt see anything good in lepacious sistas. But now, the ball is in the court of the “orobos”. While a slim person could wear many clothes to have a big body, it's impossible for a fat person to try the same trick and be successful. If it were possible for a sista to hide her big body underneath her clothes, most ladies would have become overnight “lepa”. Could this be the reason why 'orobos' lament the more these days? Lol.
Have you noticed that it's becoming more unfashionable for big people to get themselves into fine dresses in this age that western fashion seems to determine style? Body hugs and leggings become too tight for them and miniskirts and suits usually look terrible on them. What about spaghetti and “show me your navel” styles? They reveal stretch marks and make big people altogether outta style. Despite the desire of big sistaz to follow the fashion trend of the new millennium, they find themselves in native wears most times, which is getting out of style every passing day. This too is a burden of big people.
Are you bigger than you desire? Do you always wish you were slimmer so as to be able to wear all the latest fashion styles? Do you envy slim people? Do you sometimes go into boutiques and wish you were slim enough to buy some styles? Do you think you are repulsive because of your size? If your answer is in the affirmative, you are suffering from one of the greatest diseases in the whole world. It’s called: COMPARISON!
Before you go looking for magazines and books with titles as Weight-Loss Strategies,
Lose 50 Pounds in a Week, “Top Secrets to Dieting” etc, it is paramount to try the following point. It is the first step to weight loss if you so care.
WHETHER FAT OR SLIM; YOU ARE NOT LESS OR BETTER
I agree you cannot wear all the latest style. Maybe your friends call you “orobo” and you have cried and fought sometimes. It’s time to stop and look at yourself again. The true content of a man is in his soul and spirit not his body. Don't be deceived by the new fashion trend and motivational junks that says, the cover reveals the content. The most beautiful gifts in life come in unattractive packages. Gold comes with a dirty package and same with rainfall, it comes after a dark cloud. Don't get me wrong! You are beautiful with or without those latest fashions styles because your soul and spirit is beautiful.
Don't allow your cover stop you from unleashing your content. Satan's lie is to distract you into comparison, steal your joy and negate your growth. Monique in PHAT GIRLS is big yet beautiful. My respect for her increased when I read in an article long before the movie, Phat Girls hit the movies. In her words, “I am fat and happy”. Despite the harshness of the criticism for fat people in her country, she didn't allow her weight to stop her soul and spirit from functioning. Remember this always: If God wanted a 'lepa' to come as you, he would have created one. You are simply okay. Once you can feel that in your spirit, you are ready to commence necessary adjustment to better yourself. Psychologically sick people hardly make fundamental progress.
You could also develop a personal dress code that will bring out your true shape and beauty instead of wishing for what others wear. If you wish to meet an expert for advice, please do not hesitate. Do anything to be happy while working to be better. Monique has consulted with an expert and although she is still big, she has an amazing body and can wear anything she wants to. Watch her TV show and see what she has become. Also, take a second look at Queen Latifa, she recently appeared on BET wearing a fabulous evening gown. With determination and advice, nothing is impossible.
Finally, if you don't like how you look, do something about it. Hit the gym, start dieting, start walking and do anything except crying or having a pity party. Things do not change when we sit and lament or hate people who ignore and laugh at us because of our weight. Things do change when you get on your feet and do something about the problem.
God bless your heart
Colyns
