In the process of compiling this piece for the magazine, Man & Woman, I spent over a month trying to ask every woman I meet what she really cannot fathom about the man who has been (or is) in her life - her boyfriend, fiancé, father, husband etc. I got a long list of over a 100 feminine frustrations at men. The list included repetitions as most women seem to have the same line of thought when it comes to men. Isn’t that something? Maybe all men are the same as sisters always claim. I also got curse words in this little research. And because I have decided from the start to make this article as gender-friendly as possible, I omitted curse words but included women’s frustrations in sex related issues too. I find that interesting because most experts have discovered that the biggest frustrations in relationships and marriages begin in the bedroom. I hope this makes sense to men and improve the dwindling connection between man and woman. I hope you will take a step with me and add to this list too. Let’s tell the men what we dislike. Note, each of these begins with “why” so that men can answer. Maybe when answers are offered, it will no longer be as frustrating. enjoy
Why do men…
1) Have sex with women they do not have any iota of love for?
2) Repeatedly claim they want a woman who’s not interested in their bank account, but are quick to tell a woman how much they are worth by buying her expensive jewelries and dinners?
3) Say they are not ready for any form of commitment in relationship yet want a woman to be?
4) Want us to be almost completely hairless under our clothes – that’s sexy. But when we ask them to trim their chest, armpits or down there, it is considered an insult to their masculinity. When has too much hair become sexy?
5) Express their interest in a woman, when they're know they are unavailable
6) Don't understand that a good job, integrity and confidence win over expensive cars, jewelry and clothes.
7) Read playboy magazine and complain if we felt a little self-conscious? We don't look like porn queens if that’s the message they want us to receive. It’s not fair on us.
8.) Say they don't like a drama queen or a bitch, but are always attracted to one. This explains why the good girls are still single.
9) Lie all the time? Can’t men be honest with women about what they don't do, what they do, what they will do, what they won't do?
10) Treat us like angels when we're just friends, but the moment we say yes and give them our hearts, honesty and intimacy goes out the window.
11) Think if we keep their house clean, cook their meal or are nice to them, we're trying to wife them or we’re desperate? Just because we're not going to keep you doesn't mean we should treat you like shit.
12) Why are men so insensitive? For instance, my boyfriend doesn’t know my moods and what I need until I tell him. If I told him everything, he thinks I am hard to please. It’s so frustrating with men.
13) Think we talk too much.
14) Talk too little to us. Are we so trivial to them?
15) Act like they don't care when they really do. Today’s woman is fighting being tagged desperate when she shows men that she’s interested.
16) Cheat? How on earth does a man explain having a beautiful wife or girlfriend and yet finds her friend attractive? He should at least show some respect and do a stranger.
17) Hesitate from telling their female friends about us or even acknowledge our relationship when I meet their female friend. If they liked their female friends in a romantic ways, why did they approach us?
18) Talk about their ex. all the time. It’s not just right. If you miss her, go back to her.
19) Buy the wrong size condom. It freaks me out big time
20) why do men discuss our sex life with their dudes? Our bedroom life is not joke. If you don’t have anything to say, keep quiet. Don’t use our private lives in public.
21) Know they're bad in bed and don't call the next day to save themselves the embarrassment.
22) Think we like to be impressed and so wanna buy the whole world for us. Yes we like it sometimes but all the time is just unromantic and dominating. We want to contribute too.
23) Introduce us to everyone? “Meet my girlfriend” is cool but sometimes we need to be asked if we want to meet people. Sometimes we need to be ready to meet people.
24) Runaway from getting married us. What are they waiting for?
25) Play hard to get and begin to beg for more when we flirt with them just a little.
26) Hesitate in approaching women who caught their interest. How do they expect us know everything and wait until they man-up? When we are taken, they come and cry at our place
27) Express themselves clumsily especially when it concerns emotions. Why are they so shy about how they feel?
28) Love Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal, Barcelona so much? They can even ignore us for these clubs. Are we so ordinary?
29) Look at every woman that walks past them.
30) Wait for us to say, “I love you” first?
INTERMISSION
A woman is like a field. She grows what a man plants in her. There is no bad woman or good woman anywhere. If you want a good woman, plant seeds of goodness in her (treat her good). A woman is a reflection of what her man is or has become – she responds to him. A woman is like liquid. She forms an image around her man. That is how God created her - to multiply what she has been given. Remember: A woman is like a rose. Treat her right, she will bloom, if you don’t, she’ll wilt. Yes boss!
31) Hide their smile in pictures? Is that masculinity too?
32) Want to have every electronic device in this world? We only need our microwaves, freezers, cookers etc but with men, toys are new every morning.
33) Withhold the truth from their women. A woman can handle the truth more than a man. Don’t chicken- out, when the truth needs be told – we can handle it.
34) Have only one orgasm and too soon? Sometimes we want more. What do they want us to do when they cum? Wait for another one hour or day?
35) Have a 30-second attention span? They just switch off like we are so inconsequential?
37) Why can't they shave (down there)? We like it clean too.
38) Why do they wait to see our buttocks and bust before getting interested?
39) Have double standards when it comes to unfaithfulness. If they do my friend, she was the one who threw herself on them and I have to get over it, but if I do their friend, I'm a whore and worthless.
40) Try to control us like we are babies? We have our will and we can make decisions too.
41) Complain about everything – our clothes, food, friends and even our sex. It sucks. We need appreciation and not criticism.
42) Ask for your phone number sometimes with tears in their eyes, but don’t call when they get it. Some text and the rude ones flash.
43) Start blocking or shut down when we're having real talk. We love to have a conversation to know you better not to be your momma.
44) Think money can buy them love and it's what they spend that we love about them. Money will buy you other things but our love? You have to earn it by developing a personality and a sense of integrity and honor honestly.
45) Say they want a woman who can explore and be creative sexually, but when they get that, they think she's a whore and have been with several men. When we are numb, they complain too.
46) Show no interest in us until someone else has us?
47) Claim to be fearless, but when faced with real, “honest to God” love, you think it’s unnatural and you turn tail and run. Do you want us to be wicked?
48) think that if I asked them to ease up on an annoying habit like being overly sarcastic, forgetting my special days, ignoring me, or even cheating, why do they think I'm trying to be their momma?
49) find easier to say it’s over in marriage?
50) Delay in marrying the mother of their child(ren)? If she's good enough to warm your bed and have your child(ren), she should be good enough to be your wife. If it's “just a piece a paper,” then you should have no problem signing it. I find this evil because there are a lot of single mothers everywhere.
51) Keep playing video games over the age of 18.
52) Have only one dick and yet keep many women? What’s wrong with being with just one woman for the rest of their Goddamn life?
53) Buy me a drink and think I owe them my time? You offered, I didn't ask. If I have to pay, you can keep your lousy drink – I can afford one for myself.
54) say that that they want to take a break from the relationship, but call me from time to time to see if I have got myself a new boyfriend and even get upset when a friend takes me out?
55) Display their insecurity when other men are around me? If they cannot trust themselves with other chicks, I can. I am not like them.
56) Expect me to act to like their exes? Just because the last girl was impressed by their car, money, or moved in with them, what makes them think that I will act that way? We may all be women but we have different values.
57) Find it hard to lose gracefully to a woman
58) Use curse words?
59) Why do men punish women with silence? Communication is paramount to us. I told my husband to expect nagging when he ignores me. He is adjusting now. He better! Lol.
God bless. see you soon
